It is amazing how many memories are baseball related and are great memories. Hubby didn’t grow-up playing, watching, or enjoying sports – despite having grown up in Texas. I, however, grew-up playing, enjoying and watching sports of all kinds – but that being said, I was not the athlete in the family, that was my little brother.
My little brother … I miss him. I miss him much more than I thought I did and I didn’t even realize it until last night. My brother, only sibling I have, has spiraled out of control the last several years, his behavior changed, and he ceased to be the person I grew up with and knew. He’s still alive, but we no longer speak or have any contact. His abandonment of his children in favor of some knocked up whore was the last straw, I cannot forgive for that. I cannot forgive and forget that he created three beautiful children and then disregarded all responsibilities toward them.
Last night Hubby and I watched the conclusion of Baseball, The Tenth Inning last night. The first episode was great and the conclusion was equally great. The series is wrought with the emotion that is major league baseball – like Red Socks fans who waited a lifetime for a World Series victory. Talking about the scorecards placed on gravestone, people crying at victories, etc. got me thinking about my brother. So many of my baseball memories are tied to him. His first baseball game, Kirk Gibson’s homerun in 1988, Brett Butler bunting in key situations, and long drives to and from Chavez ravine. He played baseball, I went to all his games, and his son, my only nephew, loves baseball (or did before his dad disappeared).
Hubby hasn’t picked up a love of baseball, although he does now avidly watch and cheer football with me. I have lost my lifelong connection to baseball because I have been unable to talk to my brother about baseball in years. I miss baseball. I miss hearing Vin Scully calling baseball games. But most of all, I miss my brother. I doubt I will ever get him back, he won’t admit he’s ill, let alone admit he needs help. I can however rediscover my love of the game.